Thursday, October 12, 2006


Why is it that sometimes I still blame myself for my failed marriage?
When I talk to my friends about it, most of them just think I'm not over him and that I would take him back if I had the chance. I really hate that. What most of my friends don't realize is that I would NEVER take him back. But why is it not okay to still think I could have done more? When being with other married couples (as happy as we were at one point), I think how the hell did my marriage not work out? I wonder what I did wrong. Is it normal to sit here and blame myself? I'm always the type of person that looks to blame herself first rather than point blame to others in any situation. But in this case, I realize and understand that this failed marriage was not my fault AT ALL. I know fully well I did everything I could to try to make it work. I loved him with everything I had (all the way to the end). Yet, there's this slightest thought that slivers into my head that maybe it was my fault. I know better than to think like this. But I just wanted to know, I'm not perfect. I know most of you are shocked to hear that. hee

Just know this:
In the end (which is what this is - OVER), I am grateful for this failed marriage. It has been a catalyst for positive personal transformation. So I say THANK YOU!

Before I go, let me leave you with the chorus lyrics of Fighter by Christina Aguilera:
'Cause it makes me that much stronger
Makes me work a little bit harder
Makes me that much wiser
So thanks for making me a fighter
Made me learn a little bit faster
Made my skin a little bit thicker
It makes me that much smarter
So thanks for making me a fighter

No comments:


Blog Widget by LinkWithin