I am all talked out. I am pooped. I am drained. I am tired, tired emotionally. And it's just the beginning.
Today, my husband moved to a friend's house. Yes, it's really happening. Crazy, huh? Being alone at home has not hit me yet. I don't feel the pain of being alone yet. Maybe I'm just numb!
I will be moving into the new townhouse sans husband. We got the keys finally, so now whenever I find the time to pack, I can move. I'm starting back in the office full time tomorrow. At night, I don't really feel like packing. On the weekends, I don't feel like staying in the house. So, maybe I need to take a day off from work, but still drop Mathew off at day care. My goal is to move into the new townhouse as soon as possible, but definitely by mid-July.
Big day tomorrow for Mathew- 1st day at daycare. While packing his stuff tonight, I realized how much I'm going to miss him. I'm going to miss his feedings, naps, babbles, tears, smiles, laughs, skills. I'm going to miss it all. I wont be there to see his every move, to hear his giggle, to touch his silky hair, to smell his foul odors, it will be hard!!! I'll be late for work tomorrow, no doubt! I won't want to leave him.
Before I go, let me leave you with a reminder for myself:
Take things slowly, breathe, relax, and focus on the little things. Don't think too far ahead. Keep it simple, one day at a time. Take care of myself and Mathew. And don't forget to EAT, EAT, EAT!