Tuesday, November 17, 2009


Mathew told me this weekend that his step mom was cooking a baby in her belly...strange I thought. I laughed it off, but told myself to ask his dad if this were true. Mathew doesn't usually make up stories, so I was taken back by his statement and was left in total disbelief. I let it slip my mind and didn't bother to ask about it. I carried on forgetting about this comment, as did Mathew. When I called his father today, to discuss some other Mathew items of business, I realized there was something nagging in the back of my head...then he beat me to the punch. "Mathew is having another brother or sister!" So it was true! Congratulations I say apprehensively with a question mark rather than an exclamation point. And the story goes...Mathew (my little smarty-pants) deduced that she was pregnant and questioned his dad and stepmom. They had to tell him the truth, seeing as she's having the baby at the end of January. So, dad figured that if Mathew knew, it was only a matter of time that I will find out about it...so the lion found courage and finally made the announcement to me.

I'm not annoyed at all about the late announcement or the fact I heard the news from my son first. It's not really an issue at all. I think I'm just a little concerned that they failed to tell Mathew he was having another sibling in his life. They waited until he asked them. What were they waiting for? In about TWO months, my son will have another sibling and they somehow failed to mention it to him. Did they think he was not smart enough to understand? Did they think he doesn't need time to adjust to this idea? Did they think it wasn't that big of a deal? I just don't get the logic behind this thought process. So now I sit with my son, and talk to him about this upcoming life changing event that is about to happen to him (we make delicious lemonade again). I ask him how he feels about it? His response: happy! *phew* He always amazes me. He is so well-adjusted and YES, I take all the credit. :) Interestingly, the conversation carries into a different twist, asking me if I'm going to make a baby soon. I told him, no but I hope to someday. He asked if it would be real soon. I said no, that I first had to find a daddy for the baby. Then he melts my heart by saying, that he would be the daddy! I love being a single mom...I guess I really don't have that much to worry about, after all. Mathew will be just fine and already proved to me that he would tell me otherwise!

I thank god for my unanswered prayers!

I seriously with all my heart wish my ex-husband and his family a life of happiness. And what makes it easier for me to say that with heartfelt, true empathy is simple, Mathew! There's nothing I wouldn't do for my little man!


insomniac ellen said...

my grandson Matthew [now 18--the age his father was when Matt was born]has a half brother--Mr. sperm donor married about 4 years ago and they had a son almost 3 years ago. Since his dad was never really in his life, Matt hasn't interacted with this new group much. He does see his paternal grandparents alot. when Mom-Mom showed him the picture of the new baby, Matt's comment was "I hope Mark's a better dad to him than he was to me."

Oh and he went through the desparately wanting a sibling from about age 5 to age 11. at one point he asked me to have a baby.

Gloria said...

Seems that thanks to you, Matthew will be just fine and hopefully Daddy will make him feel that he's just as important to him even after the new baby arrives. Hugs to you both :-)

sol said...

Thanks for the support all!

This will be Mathew's second sibling. Dad already has a 2 year old daughter.

{{Hugs}} back Gloria!


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