Wednesday, March 31, 2010

i wish

i miss you robin!
i wish...i wish, oh how i wish so many things like

i wish you were here, i wish i could hug you, i wish i can talk to you, i wish we could wrestle, i wish i could punch you, i wish i could hear you laugh, i wish i could hang out with you, i wish i could see you play with mathew, i wish i could take more pictures of you, i wish i could see you smile, i wish i could just call you, i wish i can just see you again, i wish we can just be together, i wish you were here right now to calm me down, i wish you were here, i wish you were here, i wish you were here....i miss you so much robin!

the breakdowns never end, they come out of nowhere, from everywhere, or from something or someone. they sneak up on me and when they do, i find it hard to believe you are not here. cause i still naturally think, i'll just call you or i'll see you later. and then reality hits and it's unbearable to live with and accept and i breakdown.

Tonight, your ex-girlfriend found me on facebook and reached out to me. She sent me a nice message and posted a great picture of the two of you. Having to tell someone what happened is the easy part, it's hearing their grief, their sympathy, and their beautiful remarks about you that just take me down this broken road. my life will never be the same again. i will forever miss you till the day we meet again. and until that day, i will think of you every single day...it's really not hard to do! I love you robin! i wish..............

4 comments:

septembermom said...

Beautiful post sol. It must have been so tough to go through that grief with his old girlfriend. Robin was clearly an amazing individual in your life. I'm sorry for your loss. It does seem like he's still with you in many ways. Hugs.

insomniac ellen said...

Sol--
sending love your way. I know just how you feel. March 29th was the 4th anniversary of my ex-'s suicide. I blogged about the feelings that come over you at odd times.

the sense of loos never goes away, but it easier to manage as time goes by.

will keep you in my thoughts.

Deboshree said...

Awwwww..Come here Nancy!!!
*me hugs Nancy with all my might!*

I know how hard it must be for you Nancy. To lose a loved one, there can be nothing harder than that. But be strong now my love. I am sure you will meet again. You know, we never stop meeting the ones we love. You will meet him again and look forward to that. He must be happy somewhere. Look at it that way. Maybe I sound like an idiot, but I believe in rebirth and the concept of past live connections. You will always be with him. Nothing and no one can take that away from you.

Much love and hugs,
Deboshree

sol said...

thank you all lovely ladies for your beautiful words and kind thoughts....it means a lot to know that my blogger friends hear me loud and clear.... hugs back to you all! xoxo

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