Monday, July 17, 2006


How do I love someone that doesn't love me back, that doesn't want to be with me? How do I accept that? How do I learn to stop loving him? I keep asking myself: How did I get here? Why? How can someone just cut you out of your life? After all the years and love we've shared, is it that easy to forget? I don't understand. It hurts! It hurts to think of what I had and what it should be. I used to feel like the luckiest person on this earth to have found a love so deep and so true. I hoped others could find a love like mine. How did it all get screwed up? I gave my husband, this marriage, everything I had to give. And here I am now standing with my son, wondering how and why? It doesn't make sense. How am I supposed to stop loving him, give up, and move on? The memories aren't even old, they are still alive. The dreams we shared are still so fresh.

I just needed to let this out.

Before I go, let me leave you with the color of my day:
Outside my window, all I see is the color gray. How fitting?

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