It's Personal - Part Two

"I arrogantly believe that strong faith, compassion, and spirituality needs no organized religion." - my quote

When asked what my stand was on "religion" after reading this quote on my facebook page, I simply said:

I'm not anti-organized religion. But I do think it should be a choice, not forced by birth. I feel that religion should be personal and internal. I understand that there are some, if not many, people that benefit and need organized religion. I think religion is altruistically, inherently "good." I actually really believe religion could be so much more powerful than it is now. Operated and created by men plus altruistic and inherently good equals an oxymoron. That's why if you make your religion personal, it can stay pure and intrinsically beautiful. To me, god is in the eye of the beholder. There's no right or wrong religion cause no one can scientifically prove their beliefs. It's technically all mythical, fictional, fairytale. But in the end, we all need belief, hope, and faith in something even if it's not explained by science. Some call it religion. I simply call it faith. Why does it have to labeled? I am a strong believer (maybe even more than those who go to church every week). What is it that I believe in? It's personal. It can't be explained just like religion can't be. It can't be proven or held in your hands, but it doesn't make it less real to me. I don't feel the need to have to explain it to anyone (except my son someday). Isn't believing in something more powerful than us, enough. Isn't feeling connected to the earth's energy better than feeling connected to a statue? I know my beliefs are real cause they're mine. I'm not judging you or your religion, on the contrary I respect those with strong belief systems and for knowing what is personal to them. Look within yourself and ask "are your beliefs your own?"

Looking back after my brother passed away...I learned how strong my faith really is. I was tested, I was pushed and faced with something that didn't make sense, that makes anyone question life, the meaning of it, and even if there could really be a god. I can say with strong conviction and arrogance, my faith is strong and it didn't come from a religion! I know for ME, I don't need a religion. Do I think religion is a bad thing, no (definitely no). But find the religion or belief system that's in your heart not what's been molded in your head. It is my opinion that your faith in something/anything is only as strong as your personal belief in it. If you were born and raised catholic, your faith to that religion won't be strong, committed, or real until the day you decide that this religion is YOUR personal belief. That's why I say my religion is personal. We are all looking for something to believe in...just remember it doesn't have to be defined by an organized religion.

If your religion or belief system is personal to you, you've found spirituality that no one can touch. Faith can't be taught, it must be felt.

the end.

it's personal part one can be found here

How to Be Alone

This poem was sent to me by my friend. the friend that knows me better than i know myself, the friend that never judges me, supports me even when I don't follow her advice, the friend that would help drag the corpse across the living room floor, she's my person. she's my friend. Thanks CareBear for being you! and thanks for somehow knowing I needed this poem at this time in my life....

A poem by Tanya Davis






If you are at first lonely, be patient.

If you’ve not been alone much, or if when you were, you weren’t okay with it, then just wait. You’ll find it’s fine to be alone once you’re embracing it.

We can start with the acceptable places, the bathroom, the coffee shop, the library, where you can stall and read the paper, where you can get your caffeine fix and sit and stay there. Where you can browse the stacks and smell the books; you’re not supposed to talk much anyway so it’s safe there.

There is also the gym, if you’re shy, you can hang out with yourself and mirrors, you can put headphones in.

Then there’s public transportation, because we all gotta go places.

And there’s prayer and mediation, no one will think less if your hanging with your breath seeking peace and salvation.

Start simple. Things you may have previously avoided based on your avoid being alone principles.

The lunch counter, where you will be surrounded by “chow downers”, employees who only have an hour and their spouses work across town, and they, like you, will be alone.

Resist the urge to hang out with your cell phone.

When you are comfortable with “eat lunch and run”, take yourself out for dinner; a restaurant with linen and Silverware. You’re no less an intriguing a person when you are eating solo desert and cleaning the whip cream from the dish with your finger. In fact, some people at full tables will wish they were where you were.

Go to the movies. Where it’s dark and soothing, alone in your seat amidst a fleeting community.

And then take yourself out dancing, to a club where no one knows you, stand on the outside of the floor until the lights convince you more and more and the music shows you. Dance like no one’s watching because they’re probably not. And if they are, assume it is with best human intentions. The way bodies move genuinely to beats, is after-all, gorgeous and affecting. Dance until you’re sweating. And beads of perspiration remind you of life’s best things. Down your back, like a book of blessings.

Go to the woods alone, and the trees and squirrels will watch for you. Go to an unfamiliar city, roam the streets, they are always statues to talk to, and benches made for sitting gives strangers a shared existence if only for a minute, and these moments can be so uplifting and the conversation you get in by sitting alone on benches, might of never happened had you not been there by yourself.

Society is afraid of alone though. Like lonely hearts are wasting away in basements. Like people must have problems if after awhile nobody is dating them.

But lonely is a freedom that breathes easy and weightless, and lonely is healing if you make it.

You can stand swathed by groups and mobs or hands with your partner, look both further and farther in the endless quest for company.

But no one is in your head. And by the time you translate your thoughts an essence of them maybe lost or perhaps it is just kept. Perhaps in the interest of loving oneself, perhaps all those “sappy slogans” from pre-school over to high school groaning, we’re tokens for holding the lonely at bay.

Cause if you’re happy in your head, then solitude is blessed, and alone is okay.

It’s okay if no one believes like you, all experiences unique, no one has the same synapses, can’t think like you, for this be relived, keeps things interesting, life’s magic things in reach, and it doesn’t mean you aren’t connected, and the community is not present, just take the perspective you get from being one person in one head and feel the effects of it.

Take silence and respect it.

If you have an art that needs a practice, stop neglecting it, if your family doesn’t get you or a religious sect is not meant for you, don’t obsess about it.

You could be in an instant surrounded if you need it.

If your heart is bleeding, make the best of it.

There is heat in freezing, be a testament.

One Year

One year ago today, I lost my big brother Robin.

there are days it still seems surreal

and days that are unbearable

there are better days of memories

and days of love in the air

there are days of wishing

and days of regrets about the past

there are greater days of faith

and days i smile with tears

living in this storm of emotions

these days of ups and downs

one thing is for certain

he resides in my heart everyday

Robin,

I love you.

I miss you.

I wish you were here.

from my heart to your soul

~sol

‎...the only thing that gives me hope, is i know i'll see you again some day.

‎...i wish heaven had a phone so i could hear your voice again
...your absence has gone through me, like thread through a needle. everything I do is stitched with its color.
‎...say not in grief "he is no more" but live in thankfulness that he was
...God didn't take me away from you. He only took my hand and pull me to his side. My body is gone but my spirit will never die.
...when tomorrow starts without me, don't think we're far apart. for every time you think of me, I'm right here in your heart.
...love is stronger than death
‎...where you used to be, there is a hole in the world, which I find myself constantly walking around in the daytime, and falling in at night. I miss you like hell.

...We may not understand why you left this earth so soon, or why you left before we were ready to say goodbye, but little by little, we begin to remember not just that you died, but that you lived. And that your life gave us memories too beautiful to forget.

I also wanted to share a poem by David Harkins...I took the liberty to change the she's to he's, the hers to his....

You can shed tears that he is gone, or you can smile because he has lived. You can close your eyes and pray that he'll come back, or you can open your eyes and see all he's left. Your heart can be empty because you can't see him, or you can be full of the love you shared. You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday, or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday. You can remember him only that he is gone, or you can cherish his memory and let it live on. You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back. Or you can do what he'd want: smile, open your eyes, love and go on.