my advice to all the mothers-yet-to-be:
don't worry about finding the perfect man or the man of your dreams.
worry more about finding the perfect father for your child or the dad of your dreams for your child.
That moment when you see your ex for the first time after a break up. Knots in your stomach, sweaty palms, heart surging...what do you say? do you say hi or pretend you never saw him? do you say hi and act with no care in the world? With each encounter, the ex slowly fades away and the knots loosen up, the palms cool off, and the heart beats calmer. Before you know it, he's just a blip in your life map. an ex is just an ex.
NOW Imagine this:
That same moment above; over and over and over again....for the life of your child. No matter the congeniality of the break-up...you still get the knots, sweat and surge for each, expected visit from your baby daddy. And you ask yourself: how did you ever end up with that guy? What were you thinking when you married him? How could you make a baby with that guy? Really? Seriously? Ewwww?!?!
please choose your baby daddy wisely
"an ex is just an ex, but a baby daddy is for life" - my quote
i urge you to ask yourself: is this the man i want to be as my ex AND my baby daddy? you know, would he be the ex husband that is an exceptional parent nonetheless? this is an important question to ask when dating.
Seek a perfect father and dad of your dreams for your child.
Your child and your future ex-self will thank you!
from personal experience,
a single mother (but not for long. cause i met the perfect father, the dad of my dreams for my child)