I had a grand epiphany yesterday. It literally happened in a fleeting moment. It was fuzzy and blurry at first, and out of nowhere this crisp clear thought crashed into me: "I don't resent him anymore!" Wow! Do you realize how huge that is? Wow!
I will attempt to make this epiphany apparent in words:
I'm not sorry that he left me, not anymore. I'm happy now. I feel like a new and improved person. I feel great. Actually, I am grateful he left me. I found something inside of me that I would have never discovered with him by my side. I probably would have ended up being in a miserable marriage because I would never have left the marriage myself. So I am grateful he left. I understand now that he needed to do what he needed to do for himself. And now I'm doing what I need to do for myself. I hold no grudge, hatred, bitterness, or resentment. I can be his friend, care for him, even love him, and know that our marriage and what we had is now behind me. Wow...it feels so good. Words cannot describe the liberation I feel right now. I owe a lot of this release to the healing powers of Hawaii. I'm telling you; something happened to me when I was in Hawaii. Since then, there has been this gradual escalating feeling of release, liberation, happiness, freedom. I can't even explain where it is coming from and how, I just feel it! It feels great! I feel awesome!
Life is good!
Before I go, let me leave you with a list of words that describe me and how I am feeling in this moment: