"they" say:
time heals all wounds
it'll get better or easier with time
i disagree.
time only makes it easier to suppress the pain
time gives you a false sense of reality without the guilt
time only helps you forget
i dont want to forget
even if it means pain
i want to feel the hurt
not repress it
i want to cry when the pain strikes me
even if i'm on the sidewalk or in a store
i don't want to hide from the memories
i don't want to ignore the hurt
it's the pain that reminds me how much i miss you
without the pain, i'd be afraid to forget you
i'm afraid to lose this pain i feel
in fear of losing you
It is true that I have less days of sorrow
and more days of delightful memories
but my loss is still permanent
my hole in my heart is still empty
how can my life ever be the same again?
it won't, it just won't
it can't be without you in it
i've been missing you for 730 days now
and i will continue to miss you all the days of my life
till we meet again big brother
with all the love in my heart
i fucking miss you!
~sol
2 comments:
Nancy ...so many parts of this poem spoke to my heart. I immediately thought of my Papa.
"i dont want to forget
even if it means pain
i want to feel the hurt
not repress it
i want to cry when the pain strikes me
even if i'm on the sidewalk or in a store
i don't want to hide from the memories
i don't want to ignore the hurt"
I read that part and I know that feeling and how important it is. Sometimes I have caught the smell of his after shave lotion, or a man will have his back to me yet look so much like him...only to turn and the bubble is burst.
Sorry for your loss of your brother...loved ones we always hold dear. Always...
So sorry for your loss. Your heart is dynamic and filled with love. Robin lives on through you...
Sending hugs to you my friend.
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